How to look like a dork while running (and make lasagna in a crock pot)

Greeting from Minnesota! Well, the weather didn’t get nearly as brutal as predicted. It’s been in the single digits with on and off wind and mostly light snowfall. Not nearly as bad as they were forecasting last week.

Saturday I helped J with some things at the farm, but I didn’t end up driving anything intimidating and all went well. By mid-day, I was ready to layer on my running clothes. During this run in the middle of winter, it occurred to me that I really looked like a dork. True story. So if you wouldn’t mind looking like a dork too, just follow these easy rules.

Step 1) Plan the run for semi-extreme weather conditions. Heat/ humidity would work, but in this instance I picked a 5 degree January day with intermittent wind/ snowfall.

Step 2) Put on mismatched gear. My combo of bright purple and bright green with navy is ok, but even more colors would be. If it’s winter, you also must have some sort of face or neck warmer. Mine is that thin black thing that makes me look like I’m bald and have a huge neck.

Step 3) A waterbelt is a must to look like a true running nerd. Granted I wore mine underneath my fleece ( because I didn’t think I could strap it over my fleece). In addition to giving the impression of massive love handles, I’m sure it looked really weird when I reached under my top for a water bottle.

Editor’s note – normally I don’t take water on runs this short, but I had visions of being out longer and I was also feeling really dehydrated all morning for some reason.

Step 4) Have some sort of injury or ailment. While this isn’t required, it really helps the nerd quotient when you’ve got to stop and contort yourself into a pretzel to stretch some tight muscle. For me, my top left leg/ sort of groin area was still bothering me, and my attempts to compensate for this probably made me look akin to a waddling penguin whenever I encountered a hill. Ouch.

Step 5) Lose your GPS signal. Of course this only applies if you use a GPS watch or phone. Actually my whole phone just shut down at about mile 4.5. The battery was fine, but I’ve noticed on several other cold weather runs that my phone just dies after 30-45 minutes when the temps are cold enough. Grrr. Madly pressing buttons and holding the power switch doesn’t accomplish anything at that point. It does help you look a little strange, and I guess that’s what we’re going for.

Step 6) Eyelash icicles. Remember back in step 2 when I said you need a neck warmer or face mask? Well, that baby isn’t just for style (or function) alone. It will actually help you achieve frozen eye lashes if you pull it up over your mouth and nose. I really tried to get a picture of my stellar eyelash icicles, but they melted off before my phone had warmed up enough to function. 😦

I probably have other steps that I’m forgetting, but these should get you off to a grand start. If everything goes well, you may look almost the same at the end of your run as you did at the beginning.

I’m calling this run 6 miles at 10:30 pace. I had hoped to run at least 8, but my leg was aching and after my phone died I just decided it was a sign to head home. I don’t think I did any permanent damage because it’s actually feeling better today.

Now for the food part…

After your run you’ll need some tasty nourishment. If you’re like me and decide you want lasagna for supper, that’s great. Bake up a tasty pan covered with extra cheese.

Except what’s a girl to do when she’s going to be at the farm the 3 hours before supper, and she doesn’t want to wait for the lasagna to bake when she gets home?

Crockpot Lasagna from of course! (I never knew you could do this, but clearly you can because it turned out fabulous 🙂 ) The only downside? Scrubbing the crock pot afterward.

Please feel free to share your own tips for looking like a dork while running. I’m expecting some good ones.

About Lisa

Hi, I'm Lisa. Dairy farmer's wife and Minnesotan to the core, I write about rural farm life, running down country roads, and the food, faith, and family that bind everything together. Follow along on my journey.
This entry was posted in Cooking and Foods, Running and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

10 Responses to How to look like a dork while running (and make lasagna in a crock pot)

  1. lifeisbeachykeen says:

    Well, I don’t think I have any cold weather dorky running woes. I’ve only run in weather colder than 30 twice, and I’m quite sure I looked like a little eskimo out there.

    Crock pot lasagna sounds yummy. My crock pot bowl is cracked right now, and I haven’t made time to order another one. I must do that soon!

    Hope you had a great weekend!

  2. Kier says:

    Hmmm, sounds like I had the exact same run as you did the other day! It was -1* out and my eyelashes were instantly frosted over.

    How to look like a dork: When you lose your GPS signal, make sure to raise your arm above your head so your watch is approximately 2 feet closer to the satellite – it really works, trust me!

  3. runaroundaroo says:

    Love the get up! You do what you have to do with winter weather! I was all dorked up yesterday, but it was for sledding, not running…I’m a small child!

    I figure the sillier you look the less likely you are to get run over – people will notice you and not hit you, at least not on accident! 🙂

  4. Brit says:

    I had a pretty sweet running outfit yesterday also. It was a bit warmer here, but still only around 12 degrees in the AM. I sported black, two distinctly different shades of pink, lime green, oatmeal, and yellow. I looked amazing. Hah.

    The crockpot lasagna sounds like an awesome idea. Not sure if these would work, but my friend always uses these crockpot liners (they look a bit like plastic bags) so that she doesn’t have to scrub her crockpot. I just avoid cooking in mine so I don’t have to scrub it.

  5. I usually run in black windpants with a Golden Gophers stripe down the sides (maroon and gold), a bright blue fleece, and a super dorky gray and black hat with tassels.

    I’m going to have to look up that lasagna recipe, it sounds like a great idea!

  6. lauren says:

    I NEED that neck warmer! Just because I live in a southern state doesn’t mean I’m not cold! 🙂

  7. sweatykid says:

    Hahahahaha, great outfits. It has to be function over form in winter running… I’m pretty sure there’s no real way to look stylish in this weather. Neck gaiters are my personal ticket to running dorkdom but they are SO warm that I wouldn’t even think about going out without one in the wind.

    Also, I wear an orange/yellow reflective vest to be more visible to cars in the dark. A dork in the dark. It’s great.

    • Lisa says:

      Why thank you 🙂 Yes, neck gaiters or some sort of face protection is essential. Maybe someday I’ll need a vest too, but right now I’m way too muh of a wimp to run in the dark!

  8. Cassie says:

    funny post. makes me wish I ran…sort of…..while it’s this cold, I’ll stick to my indoor workouts in the living room. There’s a whole other level of dork-hood when you work out in your living room!

  9. Pingback: Run: January 16 – 22 | Duke's House

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